The Protectorate of The Albionia is a massive, genial nation, ruled by Arthur Cromwell with an iron fist, and remarkable for its zero percent divorce rate, keen interest in outer space, and ubiquitous missile silos. The compassionate, cynical, devout population of 3.969 billion Albionians are ruled without fear or favor by a psychotic dictator, who outlaws just about everything and refers to the populace as "my little playthings."

The enormous, moralistic, socially-minded government juggles the competing demands of Law & Order, Defense, and Administration. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Albion. The average income tax rate is 79.6%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The powerhouse Albionian economy, worth 364 trillion Pound sterlings a year, is led by the Tourism industry, with major contributions from Arms Manufacturing, Beef-Based Agriculture, and Trout Farming. State-owned companies are common. Average income is 91,933 Pound sterlings, and distributed extremely evenly, with practically no difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

The Albionia has one of the largest offshore wind farms in the world, criminals are really screwed, atheists are heavily taxed, and the new universal healthcare system has been dubbed Arthur Cromwell-care by its detractors. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to the all-pervasive police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. The Albionia's national animal is the Unicorn, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests, and its national religion is Protestantism.

The Albionia is ranked 8,955^th in the world and 524^th in Osiris for Most Cheerful Citizens, with 56.1 Percentage Of Water Glasses Perceived Half-Full.